leonhart_17: ([btvs] willow/faith - orpheus)
[personal profile] leonhart_17
Title: Something to Talk About pt VIII
Rating: PG/PG-13
Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue...
Summary: Willow gets attacked and Faith gets vengeful...
Note: Okay, this one gets a preface because it's a little bit outside the standard for this story. This chapter is darker and deals with Willow and Faith's histories somewhat. Nothing graphic, but it deals with the aftermath of violence, so just be warned - if it's not your thing, I'd wait and just read the next one (because coming up in the next chapter - actual plot! *gasp*)

Also, the first section of this one reads a bit like a prologue for the rest of the chapter but I liked it and didn't want to cut it, so I hope it doesn't bother anyone that it's not fully connected to the rest of the chapter...




Willow was quiet, had been quiet all day. She was reading on the couch when Faith came in, having just put Joy down for bed while Willow had cleaned up from dinner. The Slayer hesitated in the doorway, watching her as she thought hard. The redhead had been pensive all day, not talking much and lingering at a subtle distance, but Faith couldn’t think of a single thing she’d done to earn her the witch’s annoyance.

She sighed as she gave up trying to figure it out herself and moved forward to vault over the coffee table and landed on the other end of the couch from her lover. “What did I do?” she questioned simply.

Willow glanced up from her book briefly. “What do you mean? You didn’t do anything.”

“I must’ve done something! You hardly said two words to me all day.” Faith sat on the armrest, her elbows on her knees. “Just tell me what it was and I’ll make it up to you.” Willow just blinked at her, brow furrowing. “Come on! What did I do? Forget our anniversary? Forget to pick Joy up from school? What was it?”

“You didn’t do anything,” Willow repeated. She leaned over to pat the Slayer’s leg soothingly. “Don’t worry about it.”

“No!” Faith denied, bouncing forward to sit on the couch, facing her with one leg curled underneath herself. “Now I know there’s something I’m not supposed to worry about! Tell me what it is.”

Willow closed her book on a bookmark, leaning forward to put it on the coffee table. “Faith…it’s really not a big deal.”

“Bull! There is something wrong!” Faith scowled sullenly. “Did something happen at training today?” Willow shook her head, mouth open to speak before the Slayer cut her off with more questioning. “Joy have trouble at school?” Another negative. “Is B okay? Something happen to Xander? One of the girls hit on you? One of the guys?” Willow sent her a sharp look and Faith laughed weakly, playing with the torn-out knee of her jeans. “Okay, I wasn’t really hoping for that one.” She hesitated, swallowing hard. “You’re not sick or dying or something, are you?”

“No,” Willow said firmly. “I would tell you if I was sick, Faith!”

“Good, I would hope so,” Faith said, sighing heavily. “So, what’s wrong? If I did something, just tell me!”

The redhead leaned forward, her long hair sliding in front of her face. “It’s really nothing for you to worry about, Faith.”

Faith grumbled, standing up suddenly. “Fine,” she agreed. “You just call me when you decide you do need me to worry.”

Willow winced as the kitchen door slammed behind her. Her first impulse was to follow her lover and explain, but she couldn’t leave Joy in the house alone. “Damn it,” she muttered to herself. Bones wandered over, his tail wagging slowly as he put his head in her lap. “You’re not mad at me, are you, boy?” She scratched his ears and he sighed. “Good boy.” She could hear a sudden thump in the yard and Bones turned toward the door, barking.

Willow followed him toward the door, squinting into the dark and hitting the switch for the porch light. “I thought you left,” she commented as she opened the door and stepped onto the porch. Faith didn’t speak, just punched the tree in their yard again. “Stop doing that,” Willow said sternly. “You’re going to break your hand.”

“You can’t tell me what to do,” Faith reminded her, striking the tree another blow for good measure.

“Don’t be a child!” Willow chided her, rushing down the stairs to jerk her away from the tree. “You’re mad at me, get mad at me!” she demanded.

“You won’t talk to me!” Faith shot back. “You’ve been quiet all day, you pull away from me. I tried to talk to you, Willow! You wouldn’t say anything!”

The witch sighed, head dropping into her hand, and Faith turned back to the tree in frustration after a few moments of silence. “Do you ever think about it?” Willow finally asked from behind her, voice low.

“Think about what?” Faith asked wearily, grimacing at the blood that was running down her hand from her busted fist.

“What we’ve done…”

Willow’s meaning was clear and the Slayer closed her eyes to see the dark alley, the blood on her hands, on Buffy’s hands. “Every single day,” she answered hoarsely. “Will…” Her eyes opened and her hand was still bloody, the sight of the fresh red blood sending a chill down her spine.

“I murdered him today,” the witch cut her off.

“Willow,” Faith said, shaking off her own memories and turning to face her, using her injured hand to lift her partner’s chin. “Look at me,” she ordered firmly as Willow’s eyes rolled away from her. She could see the redhead’s guilt and pain as their eyes met, and she sighed. “He was a murderer…”

“So am I,” Willow responded.

“And so am I,” Faith reminded her. “Hell, so is Andrew! But there’s something different about you, Willow. You killed the person that murdered someone that you love. I know we’re not supposed to say he deserved it, and I wasn’t there, but he murdered Tara, had killed his ex and tried to frame B for it. From where I stand, he got what he deserved. Andrew killed his best friend. And me, I killed some poor innocent sucker who was trying to help us…” Willow’s brow furrowed and she looked like she would have protested if her jaw wasn’t in Faith’s grip. She blinked wide green eyes and slow tears rolled down her cheek. “Let’s go inside,” Faith said quietly, her voice rough.

Willow stepped back as the Slayer released her chin, her eyes falling to Faith’s bleeding hand. “We need to wrap that up,” she said hoarsely. Faith nodded without protesting, knowing that Willow wouldn’t accept her Slayer healing as an excuse not to take care of her hand.

The witch put the Slayer on the couch and went to the bathroom for the first-aid kit. Willow sat on the coffee table in front of her, cleaning the scrapes and wrapping her knuckles with cotton bandaging. “Does it hurt?” she asked softly, green eyes not lifting from her partner’s hand.

“Every day,” Faith answered, voice gruff and low. “We can never really let go of what we did, Willow. We’ve killed people. B’s the Slayer, but she’s never killed, not really. She’s not like us, babe.”

“I know that,” Willow agreed.

“Me, you, Angel, we all have to try and make up for what we did.” Willow looked glum and Faith’s injured hand under her chin lifted her face. “You’re doing fine,” she said earnestly, swallowing hard. She laughed quietly. “I know I’m probably not the best person to take advice from, but here’s what I think…” Brown eyes surveyed her seriously. “I think that you letting that piece of shit obsess over him sucks. He’s not worth it. You help people. You save people’s lives every day!”

“It doesn’t make up for us killing them,” Willow reminded her.

“I know that,” Faith said, still serious. “But we’re not those people anymore. If we hadn’t changed, we’d be Bonnie and Clyde-ing all over the place. Or would it be Thelma and Louise-ing? Either way it would be hot…” That comment got a smile from Willow and Faith grinned. “Hot, but wrong. So instead we do our saving people from unspeakable evil thing.”

“And it’s still hot?” Willow asked softly.

Faith blinked, nodding confidently. “Hell yeah!” Her head cocked to get a better look at Willow’s expression. “You get what I’m saying?”

“We’re hot?”

“You already knew that part,” Faith corrected her, sliding forward on the couch to rest her hands on Willow’s knees.

The witch took a deep breath, nodding. “Thank you, Faith.” She smiled and the Slayer’s hands curled under the back of her knees.

“You’re welcome, Will,” Faith murmured. “Come here,” she coaxed, pulling her forward by her legs.

Willow obliged and moved to straddle the brunette. “Here?” She was up on her knees and Faith leaned her head back to look up at her.

“That’s about right,” Faith breathed, hands sliding around her backside. She pulled Willow down to her as she craned up to kiss her. “This is better,” she breathed against her lips. Willow nodded and kissed her again, letting her lover’s hands pull her closer.

The kisses were slow, the witch’s hands holding Faith’s face. Faith let her own hands drag up and down Willow’s back, moaning into a kiss as she felt the tension in the witch’s shoulders. She rolled her knuckles firmly against the knots, drawing a groan from Willow. “Don’t stop,” she gasped before kissing her again.

Faith obeyed, still kissing her as she worked on the tense muscles. “You need to relax,” she said on a gap for breath.

“Working on it,” Willow answered, smiling as she captured her lips again firmly. Faith adapted to the deeper kiss without fumbling and Willow’s hands moved to brace herself on the back of the couch as the Slayer pulled her in. Faith nipped her lips, letting her tongue be sucked into the redhead’s mouth. Both hands spread flat against the witch’s back and she pressed her closer.

“Will…” Faith’s exhalation was interrupted as she heard something. “Son of a…” She shifted her hands to the witch’s hips and held her still.

Willow groaned, dropping her face against her lover’s shoulder. “Buffy?” she asked, both of them familiar with their friend’s unfortunate tendency to burst in when they were close.

“Joy,” Faith answered, recognizing the lighter step of their daughter on the floor above them. She waited for a moment, debating, but Willow leaned back and gave her another quick kiss.

“I’ll go,” she said softly, lifting herself reluctantly off of Faith’s lap. She paused at the base of the stairs, looking back at the Slayer on the sofa. Neither one spoke, but Willow gave her a soft smile across the distance, Faith returning it with a wink as she slouched back against the couch.

Willow made hot chocolate before she returned to the sofa, dropping to sit down next to Faith and handing over a mug. “Cocoa?” Faith said, looking down into her cup. “Sexy, babe.”

The corner of Willow’s mouth curled up in a tiny smile as she shrugged. “I felt like cocoa,” she said simply, taking a sip of hers. “I put extra marshmallows in yours.”

“Thanks.” Faith gave her a smile and blew the steam from her cup. She was still slouching, knees wide. Neither one spoke for a long moment, the Slayer taking a deep breath. “You still letting it bug you?”

Willow turned her mug around in her hands. “Is there any reason I shouldn’t?” she asked softly.

“He’s not worth it,” Faith answered promptly. She paused, eyes shooting sideways at the redhead. “Do you think I don’t let it bother me enough?”

“No,” Willow said, shaking her head. “Everyone deals with things differently.” She rubbed Faith’s knee soothingly. “And it’s not like you’re some creepy loner or anything. You’ve got a hot girlfriend and the most adorable kid in the world, so it’s not like you’re not well-adjusted or anything.”

Faith considered that, pursing her lips. “So are you saying that I might just have to give you one day to be all sad and mopey about it every once in a while?”

Willow smiled helplessly, leaning over to put her head on Faith’s shoulder, the Slayer curling her arm around her. “Maybe so.”

“Fine, just not too often, okay?” Faith requested. “Sad is not my favorite look on you.”

Willow laughed, dragging the bottom of her mug over the top of Faith’s thigh. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Hey, what was up with Joy?” Faith asked, taking a sip of her chocolate.

The witch sighed, though she was still smiling. “The dream…”

“No…not again,” Faith denied.

“You know this is your fault for telling her that story,” Willow countered.

“I didn’t know it would give her nightmares!”

“How is a true story about crocodiles trying to eat you not going to give her bad dreams?” The witch lifted her head to give her partner a look, lips curled in a smirk.

“I was using stuffed animals as puppets!” Faith said. “And they didn’t eat me! I even changed the story so I didn’t hurt the crocs at the end…” Willow was still giving her the same look and shook her head. “She wanted a bedtime story,” Faith said, shrugging. “I don’t know any of the real ones…”

Willow’s smirk softened and she leaned up to kiss the Slayer’s cheek. “I’ll get you a book,” she promised. “And I might have to sit in on one of these puppet story times.” Her voice was teasing, but soft and slow. “I bet it’s cute.”

“Alright! Enough about that,” Faith interjected quickly. “What happened to me helping you relax? That was making progress, I thought!”

Willow smirked, but hooked the handle of Faith’s mug with a finger and leaned forward to put both mugs on the coffee table. “It was…” She pivoted on her knee to resume her position on Faith’s lap. The Slayer was slouched in such a way that Willow was sitting on her hipbones. Faith lifted her feet, planting her boots on the edge of the coffee table and bending her knees so that Willow was supported.

Willow was still smirking, both hands meeting and their fingers combing together. Faith shifted underneath her, balancing her girlfriend on her lap. “You know what they say about bad posture, Faith,” the witch teased her.

“What do they say?” Faith asked, voice low.

Willow paused, eyeing her speculatively. “From this angle it’s pretty hot,” she confessed.

The Slayer’s eyebrows rose slowly, a smirk growing on her lips as she leaned up on her elbows, hands resting on Willow‘s hips. “Well, that’s good to know… That might have something to do with the fact that you’re sitting on me, though,” she pointed out teasingly.

“Maybe,” Willow conceded, kissing her softly.

*****

The sun was high in the sky, the air warm and breezy while the grass was fresh and green under their feet. All together, it was a beautiful, perfect day. Joy was playing happily in the yard with Bones, Faith on the far side of the yard wrestling with the lawn mower with Buffy watching Joy. Willow had gone to the magic shop to pick up an order.

Faith’s hand was just slightly sore from her assault on the tree two nights before, but there were chores to be done and she was the one who’d punched a tree. The brunette tightened the bolt under the mower to hold the blade in place, hearing her daughter laughing beyond her feet where she was stretched out on her back in the grass, the small push-mower sitting on concrete blocks over her. Bones barked and leaves crunched as they played, but Buffy’s gasp got her attention. “Oh my God, Will…”

Faith leaned up to look, catching sight of Willow’s bright hair before her head collided sharply with the underside of the mower. “What the hell?!” she demanded as she caught sight of her lover’s face, sliding out from where she was working and rushing forward. Joy made an extended ‘oooh’ noise behind her, having been lectured for saying ‘crap’ earlier in the day. “What happened to you?” Faith said, stepping closer for a better look. Willow ducked her face, trying to hide the bruises and cuts from Joy, but Faith gently pushed her head up. “Who did this?” Faith growled. “They’re dead…”

“Buffy…” Willow said, meeting the blonde’s eyes over Faith’s shoulders. Her eyes moved toward Joy, as much as they could under the bruises, at least, and the Slayer got the message and led the little girl back toward the house.

“Will, tell me who did this,” Faith demanded, wiping a slow rolling drop of blood from Willow’s cheek. “I owe them pain.”

The witch winced, catching Faith’s hand as she jerked back. “No, Faith! I’ve said that before. It never ends well. It never will.” She squeezed the Slayer’s hands. “Not for us.”

“They hurt you, they’re dead,” Faith laid it out in her simple logic, voice stern. “What did it? How many were there?”

“Six, six or seven,” Willow answered hoarsely. “Faith, they weren’t demons.”

“Vamps, I don’t care. I’ll kill them all,” Faith said forcefully, head cocking to inspect a small cut on the witch’s neck.

“They’re humans. You can’t do anything,” Willow told her.

“Someone is going down for this. I don’t care who they are,” the Slayer denied.

Willow shook her head, groaning. “Faith, no!” She knew that Faith was mad, too angry to see how dangerous what she was saying really was. The Slayer’s temper was driving her now, could drive her too far without much more encouragement.

“How’d they get you, anyway? You’re a mega-witch. I guess they were muggers?” Her fingers combed bloody red hair back to inspect a laceration near her scalp. “Soon to be dead muggers,” she growled.

“Stop saying that,” Willow requested, frustrated. “You can’t kill them.” Faith was still surveying her injuries and the witch pushed her head up to look her in the eyes. “I can’t lose you, Faith! Not like that!” She took a shuddery breath. “If you do this I’m going to lose you…”

“I can handle myself,” Faith reminded her. “And so can you,” she said pointedly. “How did this happen?”

Willow looked away, unconsciously rubbing her wrists. “My hands were restrained,” she said lowly. She knew there was no way to avoid telling Faith, but she feared the Slayer’s reaction.

Faith frowned, blood suddenly feeling like ice in her veins. “Willow…” The witch still wouldn’t look at her and she felt her hands flex compulsively. “Did they…?”

“…didn’t,” Willow whispered, shaking her head slightly. Faith pulled her into her arms, her heart suddenly pounding wildly with relief. The redhead’s arms curled up her back, the witch trembling as she clung to her. “Faith,” she whimpered, her face buried in the Slayer’s shoulder.

“I’m here. I’ve got you,” Faith promised. Willow was shaking, and she leaned over to curl an arm under her legs. “You’re okay. It’s going to be alright.” Buffy had left the door open, and she got the screen door open with the toe of her boot. Thankfully, Joy wasn’t in sight, and she got Willow upstairs without notice.

She started to put her down on the bed, but Willow protested weakly. “Bathroom,” she groaned. “Don’t get blood on my sheets.” It was a weak joke and Faith didn’t smile.

Willow hung onto her shoulders as Faith helped her stand up. “What can I do? What do you need?”

“I want to take a shower,” Willow said, reaching up to wipe tears from her face. “Please, Faith…”

“Shh, it’s okay,” the Slayer said quickly. “I’ll help you. What can I do?” She hated sounding so pathetic when Willow was the one who’d…her mind quickly avoided that thought. Willow pushed at her clothes, struggling to get her jacket off. Faith quickly intercepted her hands, helping her strip it off without hurting herself. There were more bruises on her arms, the sight making Faith’s rage roar louder in her head. Someone was going to pay for this.

Together they got the witch’s clothes off, every newly revealed bruise or cut making Faith’s wrath grow. Defined finger-shaped bruises around Willow’s ankles made her close her eyes, unable to look at them and maintain her tenuous grip on self-control. She turned to start the water, helping Willow in when it warmed up. “How’s that?” Faith asked, starting to close the curtain.

“Where are you going?” Willow asked weakly, holding onto the wall to keep from collapsing to the floor in tears.

“Give you time, get some air,” Faith said hoarsely.

“I don’t want you to go,” Willow said, other hand reaching out to her. “Stay,” she requested, curling her fingers into brown hair. Faith considered her for a long moment, finally kicking off her boots and joining the witch in the shower. She was still in her clothes, the warm water soaking into her shirt, her jeans, her socks.

Willow pulled Faith’s arm around her, stepping under the water and hissing as the heat stung her various cuts and scrapes. Blood joined the water flowing down the drain, and Faith had to close her eyes again. “Why can’t you just make them all go away?” she asked softly. “You could make it stop hurting.”

Willow hissed as the spray hit a new set of cuts as she ducked her face in the water. “That’s not how it’s supposed to work,” she answered. “I tried before. When Warren took Tara. I tried to end the pain and it almost destroyed me. All I did was make it worse. Pain is part of life. I can’t just take it away…”

“Screw that,” Faith interjected. “You got attacked, attack back!”

Willow’s fingers shook as they touched Faith’s hands on her sides. “Hon, no… We can’t afford to think like that. I…I can’t be like that ever again.” She leaned back against the Slayer, feeling her trembling intensify as steam clouded up around them. “I don’t want you to, either,” she whispered.

“I’m trying here,” Faith confessed, voice rough. “That’s the best I got.” She took a shuddery breath. “They hurt you. I want them to suffer.”

Willow squeezed her eyes closed, her head rolling back to lean on Faith’s shoulder. “Please, no.”

The Slayer groaned. “I’m trying, Will.” She touched the dried blood in Willow’s red hair. “Let’s just take care of you, okay?” Willow didn’t respond, and Faith coaxed her forward, back under the water. Slow fingers massaged her scalp, working the blood out of her hair. The water at their feet was running clear now, no hint of pink, and Faith reached forward to turn the water off. “I’ll get you a towel. Don’t move.”

Willow obeyed, letting Faith wrap her up and carry her to their bed. The brunette helped her into one of her own long sleeved t-shirts and a pair of underwear, Willow curling into the pillow and burying her nose in the collar of the shirt. “It smells like you,” she murmured. “I like it.” She looked up, Faith lingering beside the bed without touching it, her own clothes still dripping from the shower. “Will you stay? At least until I fall asleep?”

Faith nodded, pulling her sticky clothes off and dropping them uncaringly on the carpet. Normally, Willow would have said something about leaving sopping wet clothes on the floor, but it was a testament to her state that she didn’t even blink. Faith slipped on clothes to match Willow’s level of dress and slid in with her, pulling her protectively into her arms. “I won’t let anyone hurt you again,” she promised gruffly.

“I know you won’t,” Willow whispered. “But I can’t let you get hurt, either.”

“Some punks can’t hurt me,” Faith denied. “Not since they already pissed me off.”

“That’s not what I mean. If you go after them…it’s too much, too close to who we were…”

Faith was quiet. She knew that her lover was right, that seeking vengeance wasn’t a wise move, but her temper wouldn’t accept the reasonable solution of letting it go. Even after years with Willow, of being the good girl, there was still something inside her that couldn’t let go of the desire to take matters into her own hands.

Willow’s head was heavy on her arm, the redhead shifting backwards into her body, sighing softly as she felt the warmth of them surround her. She was safe with Faith, not a feeling she’d ever thought she’d have when she was in high school. But if the Slayer was there, no one could touch her. It was the only thing that could have relaxed her enough to sleep at that moment. She was still tense, nervous, but she was warm, and it was quiet, and nothing could get her in Faith’s arms.

“How’d it happen?” Faith asked, breaking the silence. She knew she probably shouldn’t push Willow so soon after it had happened, but she couldn’t help her burning need to know what had happened.

Willow sighed, curling closer to her partner unconsciously. “Faith…”

“I have to know, babe. How could they possibly take you down?”

“They’ve attacked witches before,” the redhead said softly, stiffening before she turned over to face the Slayer. “It was obvious. They knew what to do to disable… And they were fast…” She blinked back tears and swallowed hard. “They weren’t expecting me to be so strong, though. I don’t need words to cast anymore.”

“That’s my girl,” Faith said proudly, pulling her closer.

The witch took a deep breath, squeezing her eyes closed. “I don’t, I can’t talk about this… Can we just sleep?” she pleaded, relieved when Faith guided her head down to her shoulder. The Slayer’s fingers trailed gently through her hair, the touch soothing her.

The sun was up, birds still chirping outside, the sound audible through their open bedroom window, but none of it kept Willow from sleep, her body exhausted. Faith could feel her relax against her own body, but she couldn’t force herself to follow. Her every muscle was tight, nerves on fire. She turned onto her back, one arm pinned underneath Willow’s neck and shoulder. She knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep, and she gingerly extracted herself from the bed, pulling on a pair of jeans.

She left Willow sleeping and padded downstairs silently. Buffy was at the kitchen table playing cards with Joy, and they both looked up. “How is she?” Buffy asked, putting her cards down.

“Where’s Mommy?” Joy questioned, hopping off her seat and running to Faith.

The Slayer picked her up, the little girl sitting on her hip. “She’s upstairs sleeping.”

“What happened to her?” her daughter asked.

“Some bad guys hurt her, but she’s going to be okay,” Faith promised. She met Buffy’s eyes, her own fears reflected in the blonde’s eyes. “Just some cuts and bruises, nothing else.” She knew her message had been received when Buffy let out her deep breath, the Slayer’s shoulders slumped in relief. “We’ve just got to let her get some sleep, okay Joy? We’ll go check on her in a little bit.”

“Okay, Mama,” Joy said, looking confused and a little frightened.

“Hey, listen to me. Your mom’s going to be fine, okay? She loves you very much. I’m sure it’s going to help her so much when you go see her,” Faith told her, carrying her to the table. “Now, do you want to go enjoy this nice afternoon? Take Bones into the backyard,” she said, letting her down. “I need to talk to your Aunt Buffy.” Joy ran off, the big chocolate lab following her eagerly. “Leave the door open,” Faith called after her. She knew Bones would alert her if anyone was around the house, but after Willow’s encounter, she didn’t trust Joy being far out of sight.

“How is she, really?” Buffy questioned.

Faith sighed, frustrated. “Tired and scraped up, but they didn’t do…” She dropped into a seat at the table, head falling into her hands. “She said that they tried to…but I guess she got away. I didn’t really ask for details about that part.”

“So she’ll be okay?”

“Yeah,” Faith agreed, voice heavy. “Not that I did anything to help…”

“I’m sure she wouldn’t agree,” Buffy said sternly. “Faith, what are you thinking here?”

The dark-haired Slayer gave her a look. “You know what I want,” she said flatly. “They deserve to suffer.”

“Maybe, but you can’t be the one…” Buffy started. “Will wouldn’t, doesn’t, want you to.” She reached out toward Faith, the brunette shrugging off her hand. “You know I’m right.”

“Doesn’t mean I care,” Faith countered angrily. “I want to kill them, Buffy!” She pushed herself up, waving the blonde forward. “Come on,” she prompted. “I owe you one. Hit me.” Buffy just frowned at her, her arms crossing her chest. “I didn’t protect her, I let her get hurt. Hit me one.”

“I’m not going to hit you, Faith,” Buffy denied. “What happened - it wasn’t your fault.” She sighed. “I think you need to get out for a while,” she advised. “I’ll stay here with Joy and Will. You just get some air, okay?” Faith nodded morosely and Buffy gave her a small smile. “We can fight when you get back if you still want to,” she offered, drawing a weak smirk from her counterpart.

Faith was on the sidewalk, heading downtown before she realized what she intended to try. She’d always had a knack for finding herself in trouble, though she had never deliberately sought it out in quite this way before. It wasn’t even a conscious decision, but she wanted payback. Whoever had hurt Willow would pay for it with blood.

The sun was still up, and the nest of vamps reacted the way they did to such things when Faith burst in. A few ran into the sun in a misguided escape attempt, the rest cornered in the dark by the angry Slayer. “Tell me what I want to know and I might not kill you. Gang of assholes beat up a redheaded girl earlier.”

“We didn’t touch any redhead,” one of the vampires growled.

“I didn’t say you did. If you had, you’d already be dead,” Faith said easily, shrugging and spinning her stake in her hand. “They’re humans. Now spill. What do you know about another gang around here?”

There was a pause, one of them finally answering her. “Two blocks down. They hang out between that weird magic store and the hardware place.”

“Great,” Faith said, voice grim. “Enjoy the day, gentlemen.”

*****

Willow groaned as she woke up, reaching backwards to find cool sheets. She was much more sore than when she’d fallen asleep, her head throbbing as she sat up. “Faith?” There was no answer to her call, and she pushed the sheets back. Her shirt still smelled like the Slayer, and she found a pair of her partner’s shorts in the drawer and pulled on a pair of tall socks to complete the outfit. She stumbled slowly into the bathroom to check her reflection, not wanting to frighten Joy with her appearance. There was a light black eye that was only visible if someone was looking for it, but the worst of the scratches were on her arms. Everything else could be covered by her sleeves and careful hairstyling. A few adjustments to her bangs, and she was ready to go.

Buffy was at the base of the stairs when she reached them, the Slayer surveying her sympathetically. “How you doing?”

“I’ll be alright,” Willow said, smiling weakly. “Where’re Joy and Faith?”

“Joy’s in the yard with Bones. Faith went out for some air about an hour ago,” Buffy answered her.

Willow’s eyes widened and she frowned. “You let Faith leave?”

“You know as well as I do that when Faith’s in one of her moods, you don’t let her do anything, you just stay out of her way,” Buffy reminded her. “You don’t think she’s gone to do something stupid, do you?”

“You know she doesn’t have to look for trouble. It normally finds her pretty easily.” Willow didn’t have time to theorize further before the phone was ringing. “Faith?” she answered it on the second ring, sighing heavily as she was answered. “Where are you?”

“You’re not going to like it,” Faith said on the other end, shifting her weight and hearing the chains clink between her feet.

“No…what did you do?” Willow sank weakly into a seat at the table, seeing Buffy pacing.

“I didn’t kill them. I knocked them around some, but then…” She sighed. “We’re all being booked on assault - them for what they did to you, me for what I did to them. They confessed but if you press charges against them, they’ll get more time, but with my record, I’m looking at thirty days, minimum…” Faith hesitated and Willow thought she could hear her swallow hard. “How pissed are you?”

“You don’t want to ask me that right now,” Willow answered hoarsely. “What do you need me to do?”

“Will…”

“Just tell me what you need for me to do right now,” Willow interjected, voice carefully controlled.

Faith sighed. “If you could come down and make a statement, it’ll help my case.”

“Is that it?” Willow asked brusquely and Faith’s eyes closed.

“Yeah, thanks,” the Slayer said. “Will…”

“I’ll be there soon,” the witch cut her off, hanging up the phone.

Buffy took a moment to watch her, swallowing hard. “What happened?”

“She got arrested. Assaulting a gang is still assault to the police.” Willow pushed herself back to her feet, swaying slightly until Buffy caught her elbows. “I’ve got to get to the station and put in a statement about what happened this morning, but they’re going to keep Faith for at least a month…”

“Damn,” Buffy muttered. “I’m sorry, Will. I should have just punched her like she asked.”

Willow gave her a look and sighed. “It’s not your fault, Buffy. Faith is going to do what she wants to do. None of us can stop her.”

“Do you want me to go down there with you? We could bring Joy…”

Willow shook her head. “I don’t want to take Joy to see her mom in jail.”

“You’re going to have to tell her something,” Buffy reminded her gently. “And even if you’re pissed, you won’t keep Joy away from her for a month, will you?” She took a deep breath. “Faith screwed up, but not letting her see Joy would kill her.”

“No, I wouldn’t do that,” Willow sighed. “I’m just annoyed, and I don’t want Joy to see it.”

“You guys don’t fight much in front of her, do you?”

The witch shook her head. “Not really. So seeing us butt heads through cell bars is not something I want to deal with today. Maybe you could take her over there tonight or something?” she suggested wearily.

“Sure,” Buffy agreed. “I’ll stay here with her until you get back.”

Willow thanked her and went back upstairs to change. She started to swap Faith’s shirt for one of her own, but she paused. She was angry, but her partner’s scent on her was still comforting and she left it. Faith was lucky that they’d only given her a month, but she didn’t know if she could deal with her absence for that long. And there was Joy to think of. She groaned as that reality occurred to her. There was nothing for it, she’d have to get the Slayer out. Her laptop and some clever paperwork alterations helped, and she tucked the pages into the pocket of her jeans.

Buffy was in the yard when she got back to the kitchen. Joy was rushing to her as soon as she went through the screen door, Willow scooping her up carefully.

“Hey, baby,” she greeted her daughter. “Having fun with Aunt Buffy?”

“Yes! But Mama said you got hurt!”

“I did, but I’m going to be okay.” She gave the little girl a look. “You believe me?” Joy nodded, little hand touching her face gently. “That’s my good girl. Now, can you stay here and play some more with your aunt? I’ve got to go get your mom. We’ll be home in just a little bit, okay?”

“Okay Mommy,” Joy answered obediently.

Buffy was frowning as Willow put her down, walking over to speak quietly to the witch. “How are you getting her out? I thought you said they were keeping her for a month.”

“I’ve got a piece of paper from a local judge saying otherwise,” Willow said, patting her pocket. She sighed. “I’m mad enough that I could be tempted to let her sit in there and stew, but Joy would be upset, I wouldn’t be able to sleep, and she’d just be miserable.” She shrugged. “And I didn’t actually want to look it up and see if I’m right, but I have a feeling that having one of her parents arrested could make us not look great to the social workers who check on Joy.”

Buffy grimaced. “Oh, yeah. That’s no good.” She nodded. “Go get her out then.”

“We’ll be back soon.” Willow smiled tiredly. “Thanks for everything today, Buffy.” The blonde nodded, patting her friend comfortingly on the shoulder.

There was a crowd in the jailhouse, a fact Willow was grateful for as she waited in line. In a small town like Sunnydale, getting an assault suspect out after only a few hours would be obvious. But Cincinnati was big. Faith’s dismissal wouldn’t be noticed.

She turned in her paperwork and an officer went to collect the Slayer while she made a statement about her attack. She knew she should have expected it, but seeing her attackers in the lineup sent a shock down her spine. They were all bruised and beaten, and she had to close her eyes as she remembered that her partner’s hands had done the damage.

Faith was free by the time she finished, the brunette coming up to her but lingering at a short distance, not sure how Willow would react. “Thanks,” she said hoarsely. “Will…”

“Let’s go home,” Willow said, her eyes clearly showing that it wasn’t over, just on hold temporarily.

They walked to their Jeep in silence, Willow sliding into the passenger seat. It had been a long day and she didn’t feel like driving home. Faith kept giving her sidelong glances as they drove, and Willow’s eyebrows rose as the Slayer pulled over suddenly, a few miles yet to go before they were home. “Yell at me,” Faith requested. “I know you’re mad. Yell at me, please.”

“I’m not going to yell,” Willow said, and her voice was quiet.

“But you’re mad.”

“I am,” she agreed. “But I know you, and I should have known that you weren’t going to listen when I said that doing that - going after them - would be a bad idea.” She wasn’t looking at the Slayer, her eyes locked down at her lap.

“If you’re mad why’d you get me out?” Faith wondered, fingers playing with a hole in her jeans.

“I didn’t want to have to explain you getting arrested to Joy’s adoption social worker,” Willow answered sternly, giving her a sharp look. “And I didn’t want Joy to only get to see you once a day for the next month.” Faith’s expression fell further and Willow had to squeeze her fist in her lap to keep from reaching out to her.

“Will… I didn’t think,” Faith started.

“I think that’s pretty obvious,” Willow shot back.

The Slayer slumped, sighing. “I’m sorry, okay? I’m an idiot. I just react to things. It doesn’t make it right, in fact it gets me in trouble more than anything else, but it’s how I am. And hurting you or Joy… it’s the one thing I can’t take, Will.” She grimaced down at her bloody knuckles. “I’m sorry.”

It was obviously genuine, the Slayer’s remorse plain on her face and in her voice. Willow reached over and picked up her hands. The jail had given Faith rudimentary medical supplies to clean herself up, but her hands still looked bad. “Let’s go home. I need to clean these up,” Willow said. “Try and keep your hands in your pockets until I can wrap them. Joy doesn’t know…”

Faith nodded, dark eyes watching Willow’s fingers on her skin. “Will…really…”

“We can talk more later,” Willow interjected, looking up at her and smiling wanly, her exhaustion obvious.

The Slayer sighed, nodding as she retracted her hands and got them back on the road. Joy was still playing outside, not knowing enough about what had been going on that day to have been worried about Faith, and she reacted excitedly when Buffy suggested a sleepover at her house. Willow agreed, and Joy ran off to pack.

Buffy didn’t speak until Willow left to collect the first-aid kit, leaning next to Faith at the kitchen counter. “You’re damn lucky she got you out of jail,” the blonde said. Faith blinked dark eyes at her counterpart, not arguing. “I know hurting those guys felt good after what they did, but do you think this morning hurt her more than this afternoon? Willow feels with the people she loves, Faith. And losing them breaks her. She lost Oz to the wolf, lost Tara to a psycho, losing you to your own dark side might kill her…”

They both heard Joy returning, her bag bouncing on the stairs behind her. “Bye Mama, bye Mommy!” she called, running out the door and leaving Buffy to follow her, Bones chasing the little girl happily.

Buffy pushed herself up from the counter, punching Faith hard in the jaw with no warning. “I always meant it when I said that if you hurt her, I’d hurt you,” Buffy stated. “That was for this afternoon.”

Faith nodded as the blonde left, working her jaw in a slow circle with one hand. It wasn’t broken, but her lip was bleeding and she turned to spit out a mouthful in the sink. She leaned against the counter and let her eyes close. She wasn’t angry about the punch, in fact, she felt she deserved worse for putting Willow through what she had that day.

Faith’s eyes were closed, but she felt Willow’s return, the witch lifting her hands to clean them. She didn’t say anything about the red spot on the brunette’s jaw, just focused on her hands. The peroxide stung, but Faith didn’t grimace or wince. Whatever pain came next, she deserved. Willow’s hands were gentle and soft. Years of bandaging up after Buffy and Faith had given her a light touch. Faith still didn’t open her eyes as Willow finished with the wrapping, letting the witch pull her to the couch.

Willow had settled on the opposite side of the couch when she looked up finally, neither one speaking for a long moment. “I just have one question,” Willow said, voice low and sad.

Faith sat up, both hands rubbing over the tops of her thighs. “Okay, shoot,” she offered, swallowing hard.

“Did you stop, or did they stop you?”

It took her a moment to figure out the meaning behind the question, but she turned to face her partner squarely. “I stopped. I wasn’t going to kill them. I wanted to,” she admitted. “And part of me maybe still does. But it’s not worth it.”

“Why not?”

The Slayer didn’t blink, meeting her eyes solidly. “Because being a murderer isn’t who I am anymore. That first time, in the alley, I didn’t care. He was a person and I killed him. It was an accident, but it didn’t mean anything to me for a long time. I killed more people too. Never felt a thing. It’s not like that for me anymore. Killing someone kills something inside you. And whatever that is that I have left, you love it. I lose it and I lose you. And nothing is worth losing you, Will.”

Willow felt relief rush through her, sharp and powerful. “Thank you, Faith.” Lightheaded suddenly, she didn’t speak, just leaned back into her seat silently. Faith just watched her, feeling overwhelmed. They looked at each other, but it was never in the same moment, always fleeting glances. They weren’t back to good, not yet, but they weren’t going to break either. Finally, Willow stretched, grimacing at the pull of sore muscles. “I think I should get to bed.”

The Slayer nodded, frown on her face at the singular pronoun. She knew that her lover was still mad, and sleeping on the couch really was a milder reaction than she’d been expecting. “Okay. I’ll be here.” She stood up as Willow did, though she didn’t move from her spot.

The redhead was at the base of the stairs before she turned, Faith still standing. Dark eyes watched as the witch walked back to her slowly until she was standing directly in front of the Slayer. Willow kissed her slowly, Faith returning it after a moment. Her hands slid into red hair, but she was careful not to make any moves to increase contact or deepen the kiss, not sure how such moves would be taken after the day they’d had.

“I’m glad you’re home,” Willow murmured as they separated, the witch licking her lips before she went back to the stairs, not turning this time.

Faith slumped down onto the couch as Willow disappeared, relieved that she hadn’t been kicked out of the house as well as their bed. The redhead was mad, but she knew that Willow was entitled to it. She couldn’t say she wouldn’t react the same way if Willow had deliberately danced with her dark side the way she had. A few nights on the couch was no less than she deserved.

Willow had organized their living room as logically as any other room in the house, and she was easily able to find a blanket and pillows, arranging them at one end of the sofa for her to sleep on. Boots were kicked off and left beside the couch, jeans hung over the back of a chair before she slid into her makeshift bed. It was miserable alone, but she didn’t sigh or moan.

Sleep wouldn’t come easily, but she could easily hear Willow echoing her tossing and turning overhead. A little before twelve-thirty saw the witch giving up the struggle, her step audible on the stairs. Faith kept her eyes closed until Willow was right in front of the couch, lifting the blanket without a word and sliding back to give Willow room to join her. Their eyes met, but neither spoke, Willow just curling into her and letting Faith’s arms keep her close.

[part 9 here]

Date: 2011-05-23 01:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lesbianbutch04.livejournal.com
So i spent the good part of the night reading your fic and i have to say i'm in love with it. I can't wait to read the next chapter, the whole relationship is sweet and touching and i love the fact they slowly built a relationship over the years. Nothing rushed and just took the time to love each other. Also, its good to have serious chapters along with funny ones. It Shows your depth as a writer and your love for the character. If you are willing to put them through the pain to get them to the good again, than you love what you do. Keep up the great work and see you next chapter. :-)

Date: 2011-05-23 01:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] leonhart-17.livejournal.com
:D I'm a little bit in love with it too! I've got the next 3 chapters written and even my beta reader has gone over them for me, I just need to find some time to start posting them (possibly next weekend sometime.) I'm glad to hear that their relationship is paced well - I couldn't see Willow jumping into anything so soon after Tara's death *kicks season 7* And I'm glad the shift from funny to serious worked for this one - that's a relief - I've had this written for weeks now but I was hesitant about posting it since it went much darker than the other chapters had...

Thanks so much for giving this one a try since I know you're a W/T fan too :)

Date: 2011-05-23 04:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ladycallie.livejournal.com
OMG, the teaser summary is enough to make me squee like a 13 year old girl! Consider this a pre-read bonus comment. Oh, be still my shippy, hurt/comforty, angst locing heart! This is exactly what I've been in the mood to read (which is why I haven't commented on your W/T fic, as I'm still a chapter behind on that one.).

:D :D :D :D :D

Date: 2011-05-23 11:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] leonhart-17.livejournal.com
Haha, well I'm glad I could help... Hope you like it!

Date: 2011-05-27 03:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ladycallie.livejournal.com
OI! Sorry this is several days later then my first comment!

I'm so glad you decided to continue this beyond the first few chapters. I've really gotten attached to Willow and Faith as a couple (so much so that I may actually attempt to rewatch season seven just so I can look for fic openings and possibly blot Kennedy out and replace her with Faith which might actually make season seven suck a whole lot less).

I like that Faith isn't over domesticated, that she still struggles with who she is (which is a nice balance to Willow's issue of who she was and has become). Again, this pairing is delightful and I love having more of them.

Date: 2011-05-27 03:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] leonhart-17.livejournal.com
No worries!

Me too! They really got in my head! I'm the same way - I watched season 7 on reruns a few weeks ago and I was pretty much just watching the two of them (why couldn't Faith be in more episodes!? That would have helped it!) Lol, and replacing Kennedy with Faith would most definitely be an improvement!

Thank you! I thought it would be something different for this story, but they both have their histories, so I thought it would be kind of fun... There will be more coming soon!

:) I love that icon - it makes me laugh every single time I see it!

Date: 2011-05-27 04:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ladycallie.livejournal.com
I know Kennedy was created to be the opposite of Tara in every way and that Joss wanted to keep Willow's gayness, so they shoved Kennedy down Willow's throat, literally. I don't know why they didn't cut her character out completely and pair Willow with Faith, who is already established, is fan accepted and would fit the bill for very different then Tara. Didn't she even have a line in season seven about how she'd been there, done that, in regards to lesbianism in prison? And goodness knows there was enough subtext between Faith and Buffy to fill in the gaps.

It's frustrating because I loath season seven. I sat in front of my TV and sobbed when Willow visited Tara's grave and I was so unhappy that I just turned it off. I couldn't do that to myself and I was damned if I was going to see it done to my favorite character. It took me years to attempt to watch that season again. But now I find I want to, because I now ship Willow/Faith. And that means shouldering all the disappointment and more, of a season that just didn't hold up. Grrrr.

The icon is snaggable, credit is in my icon profile. :D It's one of my favorites... as is the one you used. :D

Date: 2011-05-27 08:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] leonhart-17.livejournal.com
I get that he wanted to keep her gay, but I don't understand why she needed a girlfriend (much less an anti-Tara) in season 7 at all! People can take time and mourn and it doesn't mean that there's something wrong with them! Her girlfriend died in her arms less than a year before! There was no reason she needed to date anyone! If they're going to put her with anyone in season 7 Faith was the perfect choice (its not like they'd ever paired Faith with anyone but Xander and they made that clear that that was never going to happen again) Joss has definitely acknowledged the subtext between Faith and Buffy, so I wish it would have happened - that's a wasted opportunity! (at least they're both single in season 9 so I can put my delusional little mind to work on that once it starts :P)

Yeah, I'm not a fan either, but I'd watched the whole series on reruns and didn't have anything else to do at that time of the morning, so I'd turn it on for background noise... :'( I can't handle that scene... they kill me every time! Lol, well if you're watching for the Willow/Faith you'd only have to watch 1 or 2 episodes of Angel season 4 and 3 of season 7 (I think) since those are the ones that they're actually both in... *hugs Orpheus* (Faith would have improved season 7 and she's the best thing about Angel season 4 for me)

:) I'm pretty sure I have it saved but I'll check... It's a great icon - they both are!

Date: 2011-05-27 10:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ladycallie.livejournal.com
I need to rewatch Angel, I've not actually seen anything from season five and a chunk of season two. It just doesn't compel me the way BtVS does. I only remember the scene with Willow and Fred (also a cute couple, but there's nothing but fluff there). Maybe this will inspire me to finally do the AtS rewatch.

I wouldn't get too excited about season nine. From the cover teasers, I'd bet they go Angel/Faith. Blah.

Date: 2011-05-28 12:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] leonhart-17.livejournal.com
Nah, I don't love Angel the way I love Buffy but the Faith arcs in particular are well worth checking out if you love Faith (obviously!) Lol, Willow and Fred would be cute, but you're right - it would be pretty light fare...

Eh, it's comics - we can manip the crap out of it! Yeah, I'm expecting that too, but not looking forward to it... (and I read some interview where they said they had plans for Tara, but they won't say what, which kind of scares me a little bit because I can't see them bringing her back (or doing anything with her period after so long) for any good reason... *jaded*)

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